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Am An Equalist!

Updated: Oct 16, 2023


I am part of a book club that has 10 enthusiastic ladies. We meet once a month to discuss our literary journey from poetry, thrillers, classics with each of us sharing our perspectives on the narrative, story, characters etc.


You can imagine with ten loquacious ladies together in one evening our session- goes through all stages of team work - forming, storming, norming and performing. It’s a lot of fun wrapped with equal dose of learning.


A few months ago, we studied and heard a TED talk - by Chimananda Ngozi Adichie, called ‘We should all be Feminists’. Adichie is a Nigerian novelist, non-fiction writer and short story writer. Unanimously, we acknowledged her views by shaking our heads and laughing with the crowd that was listening to her live. She explained the meaning of being feminist, the need to break stereotypes, how biases shape our thinking.


She says, ‘the person more qualified to lead is not the physically stronger person. It is the more intelligent, the more knowledgeable, the more creative, more innovative, and there are no hormones, for those attributes. A man is as likely as a woman to be intelligent, innovative and creative. We have evolved. But our ideas of gender have not evolved as much”.


I run a specialized Learning Solutions firm providing training, coaching and capability enhancement consultancy. We have a team of 25 experienced and capable people. The other day, a friend introduced me to a client saying that they have an all-women company and they offer work to ladies who are looking for second innings and give them a back to work break.


The ladies with our company have powerful corporate experience behind them. By working with us, they now also have a sense of purpose and lead a holistic fulfilling life. Our client satisfaction score is as high as 4.8. A bit like riding a bike, the competency and capability does not disappear.


I asked my friend – “Is that how you see me?” That is not my identity. Our clients reach out to us for our ability to design effective solutions and not because we have women on our team. I didn’t tell her but I thought…I take serious offense to over-playing the women bit, because my vision of society is based on merit and not gender.


As a mother of 2 boys, I am very conscious of my boys growing up in an environment where woman will not need to raise their voices or shout out from rooftops that we are equal. Just like electricity and water supply is a given so also equal status should be a given. I am determined to contribute to creating that future for all girls.


The starting point for making this future coming alive depends upon contribution from parents and especially from parents of boys. I believe parents of girls are doing a great job: sensitizing and exhorting them to unleash their potential.


I teach my boys respect and compassion for everybody, to learn to do things that we need to do - to live independently. (Not to show respect and compassion towards woman because they are weak or need to be taken care of but for human dignity and displaying humane qualities)

My younger son cooks well and bakes the best cakes. My older son can stitch and is good with cleaning and washing. My friends often joke that the boys will be great husbands and that I would be a great mother-in-law to have around.


I am passionate and committed to creating a world among equals. This belief comes from the gentle and strong men in my life – my father and husband. I have been trained by my father to live with this fiercely independent and fearless attitude. My father always instilled in my sister and I, that we could create, achieve and deliver just about everything we set our minds to. The environment at home was such that we were free to share opinions, dare to explore, happy to fail, laugh at your self and to rise again. The other important man in my life, my husband respects my robust, never-say-die spirit and has only enabled me to strengthen my fundamental self, live with full honesty and work towards being the best version of myself.


Reason I share this is for each of us to display the social accountability that we have. The role men play in the life of their women is immense. As daughters and wives we depend on you to be the wind beneath our wings. In turn as mothers/sisters we need to be the torchbearers for the young men in our life to grow into gentlemen.

Thus, What we do collectively today, will make a difference tomorrow!

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This is also the motto of our Diversity & Inclusion consultancy for Corporate. As TSol, we deeply engage with companies to embed and embrace an inclusive mindset that fosters teamwork, collaboration and thus positively impact business results. To know more, contact us on tsol@tvamevasolutions.com





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